The Interrogation of Buzz Lightyear

or, How to Make a Would-Be Hostage Taker Squirm like a Bug on a Pin

On Wednesday, June 12th, agents of Internet Mau Mau seized Buzz Lightyear from the clutches of John A. C. Goodwin. Mr. Lightyear was held over until the weekend. Softened by the days of captivity and the psychological pressure of his situation, Lightyear was ready to accede to Internet Mau Mau's demands.


Demonstrating the prisoner's viability as of Sunday.


The prisoner in repose. Note the naked light bulb and the imposing hook.


Mr. Heem begins the interrogation.


Mr. Heem explains a fine point of etiquette.


Before...


...and after?


This instrument is called an "autopsy saw", with good reason.


An enthusiastic Internet Mau Mau demonstrates the julienne technique.


Look out below!

Internet Mau Mau's Demands

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